"Jack and Jill went up the hill
To fetch a pail of water;
Jack fell down and broke his crown,
And Jill came tumbling after."
To fetch a pail of water;
Jack fell down and broke his crown,
And Jill came tumbling after."
(Traditional nursery rhyme)
Jack and Jill were the children of King Frank and Queen Jennifer. They were quite spoiled being the children of royalty. They would run through the castle and destroy everything in their path. Their parents soon grew tired of how out of control the children had become. They enlisted the help of the maids. The maids were glad to help. They had grown tired of constantly cleaning up after the spoiled children.
They wanted to start right away. They knew that this task would not be an easy one. So they waited until the children had run through the kitchen and tracked mud all over the freshly mopped floor. The king and queen noticed that the children had made quite a mess. They told the children that since they made the mess, it was now their job to clean it up.
The children complained and did not want to clean up the mess. They did not feel like it was their job. This made the maids even angrier. They told the children that they had to go get the water in order to clean the floors. The children went to the sink to begin gathering the water to mop the floor. The maids decided that it would be too easy for the children if they were able to get the water out of the sink. So the maids told the children that the water in the sink was not the correct water to mop the floor. The children, never having cleaned a day in their lives, believed this to be true.
The maids then led the children outside to the very large hill that led to a water well.
“That is the correct water” the maids exclaimed, trying to contain their laughter. “You will need to take this bucket and fill it up and then you may bring it down and clean.”
The children looked up at the hill. It seemed like a lot of trouble just for some water, but they began climbing nonetheless. Once up at the top of the hill, the children filled up the water bucket. Jack handed Jill the bucket, but Jill did not want to have to be the one to carry it. It was much too heavy. So she shoved the bucket back at Jack. She hit him so hard that he and the bucket went flying down the hill. She tried to reach out and catch him but all she managed to grab was his crown. This caused her to lose her balance and she fell on top of the crown, causing it to break.
Jack and Jill tumbled down the hill and landed on the ground. They realized how hard it was to clean the floor. They ran to the maids to apologize. The maids felt that they had learned their lesson and sent them on their way.
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| Jack and Jill by Sue Clark.Wikimedia Commons |
Author's Note: This story was written based on the nursery rhyme "Jack fell down, and broke his crown" that was found in The Nursery Rhyme Book that was edited by Andrew Lang (1897). This nursery rhyme is about Jack and Jill. They climbed up a hill and fell down it. I thought it would be interesting if Jack and Jill were spoiled children and had to climb up the hill as a form of punishment.
Hey, Stephanie! I am really impressed at how much background you put on a nursery rhyme I’ve heard so many times. I never would have come up with such a great background story to go along with the rhyme, and now anytime I hear it it’s what I’ll think of. The picture also complements the story very well. Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteI really like this story. It was nice to know the reason why Jack and Jill had to go up the hill in the first place. Royalty was a nice touch as well; it played into jack losing his crown quite nicely. The maids were pretty funny characters too! I found it funny that the maids messed with the children, and sent them up there in the first place.
ReplyDeleteStephanie: While reading your author's note, I was struck by the fact that you creatively decided to retell the story to make Jack and Jill a pair of poorly behaved kids who had to endure the punishment of climbing a hill in return for their misbehavior. However, I think that perhaps you could liven up the retelling a bit with a few more varied sentence structures. Sometimes, I felt like many of the sentences began with "the" or "they," which was difficult to see so frequently throughout the story.
ReplyDeleteAlso, don't be afraid to use graphic imagery and rich descriptions! While your narration gets the point across, maybe consider using a few more aptly-placed metaphors or other elements of figurative language. As the reader, I would have loved to see your version of the story retold in a personal, thoughtful way, that emphasized your own stylistic preferences and gave it your own stamp of originality.
However, I think that your idea for the retelling of this story was interesting and am looking forward to seeing what you choose for your storybook project!